Okay, this week I have been feeling stressed and irked by a few things. A few underlining problems. I have to let it go. I need to get it in my thick head that I am an adult, and my happiness does not depend on others being pleased with me. The people pleaser coming out again. It astonishes me that, I will worry and stress about others being okay with me, when I really should be upset with them. They were the ones who did wrong, and were rude. But I come crawling back as if I am the guilty one, just for peace. Le Sigh.
I think I have had issues having boundaries and being assertive when the time calls for it, because a little part of me has always been afraid of the consequences. I feel like David shaking in my boots in front of Goliath. If I just admired myself instead of putting everyone else on such a high platform, I could be more peaceful.
Just need to work on this: I am an adult, I make the best choices I can for all involved, and have peace with that. Stop giving my power away to everyone,
I worked out today for awhile, to burn off some tension. My HOH helped me last night iron some stress out with a little warning session about being distracted. Procrastination. I find if I am worrying, I have a tendency to put things off. If I just do what I need to do, I worry less
THINK I NEED TO CLEAR MY MIND.:)
For all that is holy, I need to stop checking facebook. Seriously. My obsession to be informed about current happenings in the world leaves me sad. I am not talking about status updates from friends, I am talking more of pages from other folks talking about current war situations, etc. It takes it's toll. While I don't want to bury my head in the sand and pretend this is not happening, there is only so much I can do. Holy smokes, I think too much! No wonder my HOH is so busy with me!
During my prayer time this morning, I prayed to feel peace in my heart today. My mind said" well, don't check facebook."
I talked with my best friend, who has a tad Obsessive Compulsive, that the best thing to help repeating thoughts is to create something positive, to create. That seems to help me.:)
Anyway, wrapping up for now.